Sunday Serenity: Self-Care to Balance the Soul


I used to think that looking after yourself first (before others) was a very selfish thing to do.  I was in a mindset that said I had to give more to others and be content with having ‘less’.  It’s almost as if I felt there could never be a balance of having the same thing for yourself and others.  Even worse (heaven forbid!) to have more than the other person.  To me it was never a question of right or wrong in my ‘giving’, it was more like, “Did I give enough?”

I couldn’t seem to wrap my head around the fact that to be ‘selfish’ is actually a very important thing to do.  By ‘selfish’, I don’t mean greedy or causing others any harm.  What I mean is that ‘self-care’ is so incredibly vital for not only our own well-being, but to help others as well.  We can’t give fully to others if we are not ourselves healthy, happy, and content.  It reminds me of the airline safety speech that flight attendants provide to passengers.  It goes something like, “Should there be a drop in cabin pressure, place the oxygen mask first on yourself and then on your child”.  And that makes sense, doesn’t it? How is the parent going to assist their child if they haven’t first taken the oxygen themselves?


I love this analogy.  I now realize that it is okay to look after yourself first; in fact, it is vital to do so.  I think society does one heck of a good job in making us feel the opposite.  I’m not buying it anymore.  And you know something? We really do teach people how to treat us, don’t we?  By allowing ourselves to draw the proverbial line in the sand which says, “I will always give to others, but I expect to receive as well” it’s really saying we want to live a life of balance.

Whenever I am tempted to go a bit overboard with giving to everyone but myself, I try to picture a ‘balance scale’ with one side practically tipping over, and the other empty.  I then realize that my inner ‘self-care’ balance is wayyyyy off and I need to rectify it as soon as possible.  The reason for this is because it truly does throw every other part of your life out of whack, for lack of a better term.  Giving too much deletes our own happiness, our feeling of self-worth.


I still have a lot to learn about self-care versus giving too much, but I wanted to share this with you today in case anyone else needed a wee reminder as well.

I hope your Sunday is balanced to your sheer and utter delight!

  25 comments for “Sunday Serenity: Self-Care to Balance the Soul

  1. February 25, 2018 at 12:32 pm

    Happiness and joy and peace of mind is all I wish for you today and always. Take good care of yourself and I love your post tenderly.

    Liked by 1 person

    • February 25, 2018 at 12:33 pm

      Ah dear Mihran, thank you so much for you lovely and kind words. Thank you, and I wish you the same! Cher xo


  2. Kara Post-Kennedy
    February 25, 2018 at 12:37 pm

    Love this! I have used the same analogy ( on my blog regarding self-care. It is such a hard thing for most of us to realize that breathing, for an example, is NOT selfish. The older I get, the more life demands I take better care of myself, and I am grateful for it.

    Liked by 2 people

    • February 25, 2018 at 12:42 pm

      Excellent post, Kara! I agree with everything you said! And I love the André Gide quote: “It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.” Thank you so much for including this excellent post! It speaks volumes to me! Cher xo

      Liked by 1 person

  3. February 25, 2018 at 1:40 pm

    This is such an important insight. Too many people feel guilty when they are not putting themselves in second place. But you can’t give away what you don’t have. So you need to be powerful in order to give power, you need to be healthy and energized to care for others. When we knock ourselves out it doesn’t help anyone. It already helps others when they feel the strength and steadfastness of the person in front of them. Great post, Cher!

    Liked by 1 person

    • February 25, 2018 at 4:45 pm

      Ah, thank you so much, Erika! Your words are wonderful as always! Yes, you are so correct; and we tend to think we are doing the ‘right’ thing putting ourselves second but we really aren’t, are we, Erika? It doesn’t help anyone, you are right! Thank you so much for your wise words! Cher xo

      Liked by 1 person

    • February 25, 2018 at 4:43 pm

      Thank you so much, my dear friend! Cher xo


  4. Annie Van Es
    February 25, 2018 at 4:23 pm

    You are absolutely right. When you do not feel well, you have to care first for yourself. Else you cannot mean some for some one else.

    Liked by 1 person

    • February 25, 2018 at 4:46 pm

      Why thank you so much, Annie! Yes, I agree with you. We need to take care first for ourselves and then we can help others!! I appreciate your words, Annie! Thank you! Cher xo


  5. RMW
    February 25, 2018 at 6:24 pm

    I had to learn this lesson. It was very hard to say no at first. And I certainly felt (and was made to feel) selfish. But gradually I’ve seen how important it is to take care of myself so I can be there for others.

    Liked by 1 person

    • February 25, 2018 at 7:16 pm

      I love your words; thank you so much, and I’m so glad that you now take care of yourself first and yes, then we can be there for others. Cher xo


  6. jakesprinter
    February 25, 2018 at 6:52 pm

    There is so many ways to give and received , even you don’t have a pure action seeing by naked eye of others 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. February 26, 2018 at 11:03 am

    This is a timely post for many of us and such good advice. Thank you, Cher. Have a great week! 🙂🌻

    Liked by 1 person

  8. March 4, 2018 at 3:35 pm

    I know what you mean Cher, I have had problems with altruism.

    Liked by 1 person

    • March 4, 2018 at 4:28 pm

      Ah, bless! Well then you know it’s important to look after yourself, Ronnie! But I know you already know that! *grin* Cher xo

      Liked by 1 person

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